Why You Should Love Dating In Midlife
So, here are you are. Chances are being single in your 40s or 50s was not part of the plan. More than likely you’ve looked around and have come to the conclusion that the dating world has completely evolved and so have you. And if you find yourself dwelling a little too much on the differences between then and now, take heart. Here are just some of the positives of being single and dating at this stage of your life
Right now, you can choose to date for no other reason other than it would be nice to have a partner. You are free to connect with someone else purely for the sake of connection. In your late twenties and thirties, starting a family may have been on your mind, or you may have felt some pressure to “settle down”. Feeling the pressure or hearing the ticking of the clock can definitely influence your partner choices. But now you are in the position to focus only on you and finding the type of partner who will enrich and complement your life.
You know what you want
Speaking of partner choices, it’s likely that you know more now than you did then. A lot more. You know more now about what makes a relationship work, and you have likely done some reflection, growing and personal development along the way. In some ways, it will be easier. With your life experiences and past relationships, you will know pretty early on if there is a connection and if you can see that person fitting into your life. But it’s still important to take it slow. The flipside to knowing more is falling into a relationship too quickly, for the wrong reasons. The feelings of loneliness can very strong after a marriage or long-term relationship has ended. You’ll want to be sure that you aren’t just filling the void left by your former partner.
Meeting people is easier now
I know what you’re thinking. How can it be easier to meet other singles when you are surrounded by couples? It might seem that way within your own circle. But meeting other singles in any age group has actually never been easier.
Online dating sites and mobile app dating has definitely widened the net. Several sites are dedicated only to mature dating and if you are patient and invest the time it can be a great option. But it’s not for everyone. If you find online dating too public, time consuming or frustrating, working with a local matchmaker is also an effective alternative.
Social media is another avenue. You can connect with friends, friends of friends, and re-connect with old friends (maybe an old flame?). And then there are the many social organizations that cater to only singles from travel companies to local groups on MeetUp. These groups are also a great way just to meet other like-minded new friends who get you in this stage of your life.
Terran Shea is a Matchmaker and Dating Expert with MutualMatch.ca